Wednesday, February 24, 2010

and in addition...

So, coincidentally as it may seem, as I published the last blog, the phone rang and to my delightful surprise, it was that lovely Romeo. It makes my day to be able to talk to him. I mean to be honest, even when he was here, it would make my day when he would come home from work, so now, the equivalent, is hearing his voice.

Romeo isn't having a great time in that quake-ridden land. He's not too happy of a Soldier right now. Which, as I am sure we can all sympathize, is partly due to the fact that as the days go on, and other companies continue to make their way back home, Romeo and his unit remain unmoving. Think about being on a plane and landing at the airport. As you get off, everyone is greeting their families and heading on to their destinations. You're looking around and waiting for your friends or family, but as everyone else begins to dissipate into the crowd, you're just waiting. And waiting. And looking around. And waiting. With no sign or inclination as to when your group will be there to bring you home. Welcome to Haiti.

Anyway, on top of the impatience, and the frustration of limited missions, and maximum down(boredom)-time, now, Romeo isn't even going to recieve the letters or packages or anything else that was en route to bring a smile to that handsome face of his. I must say, I'm going to take the blame on that one. I had a package ready and assembled, but just kept getting side-tracked on my way to the post office. Once I finally got there, the very grumpy mailwoman informed me that I should not expect the package to be recieved in any less than 30 days due to the back-up of postal items on their way to the island. Bad news to the ears of the girl who just made cookies and bought some semi-perishable items to send, in hopes of making someone's day a bit better. So I had to take all of the food-like items out of the package. Now, I have this half-filled box of stuff to be sent South, but now I'm not even sure it's worth sending if its going to take more than 30 days. Honestly, I was kind of hoping to have Romeo back here before then?

Needless to say, I'm winning the World's-Worst-Wife award for missing the ball on sending things to my deprived Soldier. Fail.

So what do we do? When we've got miserable, cranky, dirty, smelly Soldiers and can't even think of any more words to say to make them feel better? Letting them vent is great and all, but isn't that more frustrating when after they're all done their rant, there isn't anything you can say to make it better? I don't know how many more times I can say
"You'll be home soon."
before even I get sick of hearing it as an excuse? Because after awhile, it doesn't work as a bandaid anymore. It doesn't do anything to help the hurt or frustration or anything else. So what is left? I can pray and tell him to pray and ask others to pray all I want, but as for that moment, the moment where the anger and animosity in his voice is too much, what do we do? How do I make that go away? Even worse is as I am frustrated with myself for not being able to do anything about it, I'm frustrated for Romeo because there isn't anything he can do either! And at least as I am frustrated, I'm frustrated with hot showers and clean clothes and food that doesn't come in brown plastic sacks. Romeo is stuck being miserable and frustrated in a place without sufficient running water, let alone HOT running water, the place where undershirts and socks go days being worn without being washed. And that place where a cot, inside a tent, on top of sandy ground is "home".
So... here we are. Still frustrated. Still stuck between a rock and a hard place with nothing to do but wait. You know, love is about the knowing that someone, no matter the circumstances, will always have your back. I know, no matter what, that Romeo would do anything for me. I can't help but fear that even just for a second, he's questioned that in me. I really would do anything, but how do I do anything when I can't figure out the anything to do? If I could find the words or a hint at what to do to make things better, believe me, I'd do it in a heartbeat. It's just that right now, I am so helpless in my quest to be helpful. And that, is a terrible feeling.


  1. just say i love you. that's all you need.

  2. I think just talking to you probably makes him feel better. YOURE that little piece of home and comfort.